Give The Man a Hand ……              by Liz Pastorek

Remember when you first learned to drive a car ?

Keep the car inside those narrow lines; look out for others; keep to the speed limit; watch out for street signs; anticipate that turn at the next corner; look out for dress sales in shop windows; check your make-up in the mirror, and carry on polite conversation with your passenger !

That’s all a man has to do when he’s dancing.

Move around the floor in the right direction, to the beat of the music, steer his partner, (who may not be power assisted ), watch out for others, ( who may be backing up ), decide several steps in advance if he can make the corner, while carrying on polite conversation with his passenger – partner.

Even for an experienced dancer, this can be hard. But for a non-expert, this can be a nightmare. So what’s a lady to do if she doesn’t have an experienced chauffeur ?  Glad you asked. Give the man a hand

When you give your man a hand, be sure it is light. That left arm on his shoulder can feel like a ton after a few rounds. Try for yourself – let your partner rest his arm on your shoulder for one waltz.

Know your own steps. No man can lead you through something that you don’t know, except by carrying you. Have enough pride in what you do that you feel good about knowing your steps. If the idea of dance is to show the lady – give something to show: a good posture, a proud stance. If you look down, you will feel down; look up and feel up.

If your partner is new at this, limit your conversation. He may be concentrating. If you are one of the lucky ones who has an experienced partner, share him occasionally, if he doesn’t mind.

Don’t criticize or be picky if he doesn’t do things quite the way you want. No one likes a backseat driver.

Life is too short to dwell on negatives, enjoy the positives. It comes down to empathy – feel what he may be experiencing and imagine how you would like to be treated if the situation were reversed.

Then give him a psychological “ hand “ of applause – an honest compliment, a thank you.


When Banks Say “ NO ! “  - We Say “ Yes ! “